Worked today and I feel like I’m teetering on the edge
between stressed and not giving a fuck.
It is a split between my desire to stay calm and my desire to do well. Because to stay calm, I don’t overwork but by not overworking, I feel like I’m faltering. I feel like I’m failing.
I don’t know which side will win but right now it’s myself and making myself happy and comfortable.
Fuck everyone else.
Too much thinking
Got home and started to think about work and now I feel wound up.
I feel like there’s things that I should have done or should do but the feeling is like - DO IT RIGHT NOW!
But then….I don’t want to. I deal with enough of that bullshit during the work week. Let me have my fucking Saturday!
(I’ll be working tomorrow - yay me and no Sunday)
Oh why must you go away
This weekend was really nice (but short) and I realized it’d been a while since I had a weekend just for me.
I left the house to get groceries and that’s it. I rediscovered the pure ecstasy that’s is lying on a bed of best linens and just cuddling with my pillows.
I wish I could have more days like this. It is definitely what I needed.